even though your parents started fighting when your mom was trying to read a letter about you to your dad, it is quite possible that this argument had *nothing* to do with you at all. your parents might (in fact, they probably *do*) have a lot of problems in their marriage that have absolutely nothing to do with you or your brother. maybe your mom is just generally frustrated with your dad because she feels like he never listens to her--that would explain why she went off on your dad when he wasn't paying attention to her when she read the letter. if that's true, then the argument couldn't have been about you at all--it was just another example of her being fed up with your dad not paying attention.

my point is i think this argument probably says more about the state of their marriage, over which you and your brother have absolutely no control or responsibility, than it does about how either of them feel about you. your dad might have been very interested in hearing that letter *after* he had finished ordering the pizza. but as you know, once you start fighting with someone you have problems with it can be *really* hard to stop quickly.

i know it's probably really hard to even *think* about talking to them about this, but your parents need to know how their fighting is affecting you and your brother. maybe you could write them a letter (but give them each their own copy so they can't fight over when to read it! ). Or maybe you could print out what you posted and give them each a copy.

most of the time adults don't really understand what effect their fighting has on the children in their lives. and if your parents *are* having marital problems, they're probably too wrapped up in those to realize that those problems are affecting you and your brother too.

these are just my thoughts on what you posted--i might be completely off-base (i've never met any of you and i wasn't there), but i hope this is a little helpful.