This had been one of the hardest days of my life and i have finally realised that i meant absoloutely nothing at all to him.

I have not spoken to my ex for a month, not including the text i got just over two weeks ago. My ex responded a month ago to my many mesages saying that he was messed up and needed time for himself and that it was not me, but him and that he still loved me. I left him a chistmas present in his mailbox, he does not live there, but is at his parents house which is out of town. The present was gone, though his estranged wife could have got it. He did not tell me he got the present or anything.

Anyway two weeks ago he did respond to a message i sent which asked him how he went at court, to which he replied thanks for the luck today, and am now able to see the kids through supervised visits, thanks again.

I thought that i was giving him space and that he might come back to me as he had in the past, but now i see how wrong i was.

Today i see his car with his wife sitting in it, well technically it is her car, but he gave her his car as it was bigger and he was using this one.
Last time i heard he was not allowed to see her or contact her at all and was not allowed within 200 meters of her. He was facing charges for breaking the AVO that was in place before, and resisting police arrest and driving recklessly, so unless within 2 weeks he is now allowed to see her and considering it was christmas and i do not see how the police would drop the case and court would have not been in session than they are both breaking the AVO.
You can read my other posts about him if you want more background.

That not really the problem, but after seeing her and though i did not see him there is no other explanation. I just feel so stypid and embrassed as for some reason i love him so much and i was holding out hope that i would hear from him again, but now i realise the truth he never loved me at all, he hates me and would not even give me closure and tell me the truth. They are both laughing at me and it makes me sick, there laughing at everyone.

So i guess you can cheat on someone, threaten to kill then, actually try, but stop yourself, run your wife and your children off the road and still end up with the girl and absoloutely no consequences. You can use some other girl and fill her head with lies, and make her still hope by not giving her full closure just to get your kicks, make her fall so completly in love with you and then throw her away like a piece of garbage, you can escape all accountability from the law and from your family and rip someone elses heart out and kill there soul!!!! But still your life will tun out GREAT!!!! YOUR MARRIAGE WILL BE BETTER THAN BEFORE

What is worse is I thought i knew this person, but i was so wrong about there character and now he gets everything he wants and i have to have her smug grin in my head everytime i close my eyes, saying i won and we are together and have out witted everyone, the police, his parents and especially you, as there i was feeling sorry for him and worried about him, fool for me, as i belived he would secretly come back like all the other times.

I mean i got home today and wrote my suicide letter, as i cannot take the pain of lfe anymore i am too soft inside and i hurt to easy, what i did was wrong when i got involved with him that he separted wo days ate, maybe it would be better if i died then i can recieve my punishment for what i did,

I dont know much about relationships and considering he can do what he did to her, then i guess they love one another alot.