Another person's anger is about their problems, it is their anger. "What can I do to help you?" might help calm a person down and get them working productively to solve whatever problem they are having?

If another person is angry at you, that does not make it your problem or mean you have to do anything in response. If you do not agree that the problem is both of yours, decide you do not want to be part of that problem and its solution, you just have to state your decision.

"You were late getting dinner on the table!" That another person uses "you" instead of "I" statements just means they are blaming their own problems (being hungry and wanting to eat at X time) on you. That does not make them your problems!

Confronting the person with statements such as "If you want dinner at a particular time, YOU make it!", just keeps the blame going back and forth (now we are blaming our frustration at being a "target" of another person's moods on the other person; not everyone would react with frustration (the frustration we feel, is ours), some might think the other's "where's my dinner?" as whining/petulant and laugh that a grown man would express such a sentiment, for example) because of the use of "you" statements rather than "I" statements. Just going back and forth with "you" statements does tend to escalate the situation.

Always try to respond to another with "I" statements. You only know about yourself and how you feel. In this case, you might inform the other as to your feelings about the situation, or your take on the situation.

"I feel frustrated, do not know how to reply, when you blame your hunger or time scheduling decision malfunctions on me."

"I am sorry dinner was not ready when you anticipated it being so. Next time I am not going to be able to have dinner ready when we normally eat, I will try to warn you so you can eat a snack, would that help?"

"I am sorry dinner was not ready when you anticipated it being so. I will try to prepare dinner so it is ready within an hour of your evening homecoming but sometimes that is not possible. In the future, I will try and let you know when those times will be so you can be better informed."

If you want to re-negotiate the dinner situation entirely, you have to start a conversation about that, hopefully not act in a passive aggressive way of thwarting the habit that has been formed.

When/if your spouse "announced" that dinner would be at 6:00 p.m. every night and you went along with that (whether out of fear or for some other reason) that is your problem, not the spouse's. It is your job to take care of yourself emotionally because you are the only one who can, they are your emotions. Taking the less confrontational path out of fear will almost inevitably lead to anger later and it will often feel "stronger" because the person will have been "led on" by your doing what was asked, implying you agreed with what was asked.

Stating your own feelings, where you stand on any situations that have anything directly to do with you (where a demand or assumption is being made on you or a request is being made of you) is the best way to keep situations as non-confrontational as possible. Yes, you have to say, "No, I do not want to do that" but that is easier than saying nothing and doing what is asked so that you are resentful, angry, feeling taken advantage of (you cannot be taken advantage of without your consent; non-response is consent) and then when you say, "No, I do not want to do that" there is the legitimate complaint from the other side "But you were doing it!" and the disruption of what the other person had come to depend upon. So, now, both people are feeling resentful, angry, and abused instead of there just being the simpler discussion of how to get dinner on the table each night?