thank you for the kind wishes and good thoughts from those who popped in.

one never expects certain things to happen in life but life is full of that uncertainty element....

relying upon people to the extent this time was extraordinarily painful and difficult yet NECESSARY for survival.

fortunately years of therapy and building a wide and varied support network helped there to be a larger pool of resources to draw from once the stupid pride issue was knocked aside.

learning that people can be trusted and be true to their word is so very healing and helpful to undoing the years of maladaptive "don't need nobody, don't need nuttin', don't need!" attitudes borne of severe abuse to innocent youth.

wishing for more stability and structure and schedule. rather hard to do with driving all over this wacky coastal state every day just to make the rounds and do what needs to get done.

it will come. eventually some peace will decend into this body. the morning yoga outdoors in the sun by the redwoods is rather helpful for the grounding aspects.

no time for libraries due to wait time for Internet terminals and driving schedule. this dial up is rather shocking after dsl and taking much changing of settings so as to maximize speed and minimize distractions (i.e. siggys, avatars, pics in general ) but after weeks of only a couple check ins briefly on borrowed laptops this will do for now.

one day one breath one moment

be here now