Quote:
Originally Posted by Giabrina
About two weeks ago, the police came to my house after I made a phone call trying to get information about an intensive outpatient program. The intake worker went thru the standard questions one of which she asked if i was suicidal. My response was "suicide is always an option"
A few questions later she asked if she could send someone to my house to check on me and I told her that I was fine. I was not feeling suicidal at that time. Long story short, the police came along with my husband. Since the police officer who got the call knew my husband, he called him and brought him along. When the walked in, I was busy cooking dinner and the kids were doing their homework. I told the officer I was fine and he left. My husband also left without acknowledging me...he simply went back to work. He would not even look at me when he came home from work and gave me the silent treatment for two days. When he finally came around to talking, he said that that incident was just another episode of my behavior that he doesn't understand and doesn't think is right.
I would appreciate any thoughts/opinions/suggestions on the following three topics:
1. Was I wrong to say 'suicide is always an option', even though I wasn't feeling suicidal at that time?
2. Did the police have a right to bring my husband to the house, which didn't help our marriage problems -- it only made it worse.
3. Heaven forbid if I was really suicidal at that time and all my husband did was go back to work and leave my alone. Did I deserve more support?
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1 I think you already know the answer to that.. if you hadnt they wouldnt have sent the police and the police wouldnt have picked up your husband. saying "suicide is always an option" people who are not suicidal answer "no I am not suicidal" "no I have no suicidal thoughts" Saying what you did is the same as saying yes, I am suicidal and yes I have suicidal thoughts.
2. yes they had a right to bring your husband home. the person you talked to on the phone didnt know whether you were suicidal or not because you did not tell her no. most people who are suicidal and dont want to be found always say they are ok anyway even if they admit to being suicidal. the police didnt have any idea they would not find you dead, od'ed, or had done other forms of suicide. bringing your husband with them saves time in locating him after the police find you unconscious or so unstable that you are unable to make decisions on your own. most if not all people who think suicide is the option to solving their problems are most times if not all so unstable they need involuntary commitment or arrest for being a danger to their self or others. your husband may also have been needed since you have children that would have been unattended if they hadnt brought your husband along your kids may have been placed in state care.
3 you deserve support for your problems, but your husband now because you stated that on the phone may be feeling like you are calling wolf, faking your problems for attention. when this happens most people dont give the attention so that the person calling wolf wont fake it again. you know you werent faking a suicide attempt just to get attention but your husband may not know that if you have a past behavior of using your problems for attention.
my suggestion breath and then talk with him about it and talk with your treatment providers so that you will understand what things are considered a suicide threat or a statement of danger to yourself or others in your location, so that next time if you do not want the attention of the police and this same reaction from your husband this wont happen.