Hi
I thought I'd write and tell a little about myself and the recent happenings in my life. I'm in a wheelchair due to a birth defect. This birth defect has led to 16 surgeries and many invasive procedures. These procedures have caused mental/emotional pain from which I'm trying to recover. Add to that the idea that I may have been sexually abused as a child. What it leaves is a whole big mess. I was all set to finally make a police report (and I did) when I found out from my Mom that the perpetrator could not have done those things that my mind said he did. That there may be other people involved as well. And that, more than likely, my PTSD and DID were triggered by the many invasive medical procedures I've endured throughout my life. Now, I'm not saying it couldn't happen, but why would I have the images in my head that I do if nothing actually happened? Would exposure to invasive medical procedures as a child be enough to cause the PTSD?
Also, I wanted to ask about PTSD itself. Does anyone share this experience? I'm so hypervigilant that I actually scare myself sometimes. I get startled so very easily that a significant pause in conversation can cause anxiety about whether the speaker is going to startle me when they resume speaking......Anything at all sudden can startle me. Even when I know it's coming, it still startles me. As a result of this startle response I've thrown things, broken things, slapped people and induced full-on panic attacks in myself. Anyone who's got any experiences in this is welcomed to respond.......
Toesquasher