Hi Sandworm,
(What a cute name).
I'm not sure if these are little things but what has helped me tremendously are 1. Going to therapy at least 1x a week.
2. Taking medication.
3. Going to Al Anon meetings.

As for something small... The statement that I need to "keep the focus on myself" has been like gold. Even now as I struggle with the idea of what "god" or a "higher power" means to me (I feel that I have been leaning toward atheism lately) this statement has been one that I hold dear. It is my life and I take responsibility for myself alone. I cannot fix the lives of others. They must take care of their own lives, unless I am directly asked for help, it is none of my business. This has been a new and important concept for me.

Elana