Hi

I don't even know where to start again so, here it goes.

First of all, I feel unloved. Unloved by my friends, not respected, taken for granted.
I know it doesn't mean that they don't like me when I don't hear them daily or even weekly, but I'm too dependent on them. I feel like, if I don't hear them, they don't wanna talk to me or be my friend anymore. Which makes me feel lonely.
That's why I wanna be less clingy and less dependent on them.
I don't wanna feel alone, rejected and all paranoid when my friends don't text me weekly or we can't meet up weekly.

Also, one of my best friends has two best friends (me and another girl) I'm not too keen on the other girl cuz she's quite intimidating to me. Sometimes I feel like my friend prefers her over me, cuz she's not asking me to come with to parties and stuff. Maybe it is cuz we all have exams in a while and I really need to study a lot now so I don't have much time to go out and party. But then I start to think that she's not asking me cuz she doesn't want me there.

I just wanna be the laid back, relaxed girl that's not obsessed and scared about her friends. Every time something's different I feel like they stopped liking me and i'll end up alone...