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(JD) · Jan 07, 2012, 06:30 PM

Once you identify it as pain, then go ahead and manage it...with ice, heat, and medication. It's real at that point.

Yes, your body could be experiencing body memories. It's good that you've already recognized this, and can begin to change your thoughts about your mom in the future to help prevent your returning physical issues.

Reframing your negative thoughts would probably be good for you. Take some time to truly think about the current issues with your mom, and what you can and cannot do for her...and make decisions about what you can and must do for yourself. Remember, your mom is an adult, and she remains an adult regardless of her condition. She made choices in the past (and present?) that affect how she lives now. That is not your problem. You can only do the best you can do for now, for who you are, and what you and she need from the relationship.

Reframing negative thoughts, or past thoughts about how her actions harmed you or whatever, would involve acknowledging that you did feel that way, but now.... "yes, she beat me in the past and I feel like she is beating me again with her demands today... I am an adult now and will not allow her to treat me this way, even if it means I have to spend less time with her." for example only.