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Old Jan 08, 2012, 05:01 AM
korafrancesca korafrancesca is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2012
Posts: 45
What are the crazy/creative/ingenious ideas you have had when you were manic?

I once suggested a research idea that bridged two seemingly unrelated disciplines to an undergraduate adviser, who said it could be "quite fascinating" dissertation and then encouraged me to get a PhD in Political Science. I could never have come up with that in my normal state. Even when I was hospitalized, I spontaneously stood up and gave a very lucid speech during a group therapy session about why we all had to recover and get out of the hospital - because the experiences of pain and suffering that we had made us so much more aware and that we needed to use that knowledge and compassion to help others, that standing in a room on the fifth floor of the hospital, looking out the window at all the people below who might need help, we were like the Gods. Obviously very grandiose, I was manic, but makes sense in a way right? I dread public speaking normally and I can barely form two sentences if I am put on the spot.

Then I thought, "What if I were an investigative journalist pretending to be insane so that I could infiltrate a psych ward and expose the institutional deficiencies of the mental health system?" That would be a good screenplay. I love the idea. And then I tried to start a patient uprising against the nurses a la Stanford Prison Experiment, where the prisoners eventually rebel against the guards. I saw the hospital workers as the oppressors and the patients as the oppressed. I knew at the time that was not acceptable, but I was feeling mischievous. Since I was already in a safe, enclosed facility where normalcy is not expected, why not do some social experimentation?

I find it so bittersweet that I am able to think with so much more originality when I am in a manic mode, although it has only happened once and the negative out-of-control consequences devastating enough for me to never want it to happen again. But still, when it happens, I see patterns everywhere, I derive theories and principles, I write epic essays. Everything makes so much sense, it's all clear and magical.

Then afterwards when the euphoria fades, I can't think so fluidly anymore! Some of my theories and ideas I remember, but others were so complex I can't piece them back together even though I am sure they had some fantastical logic.
Thanks for this!
kindachaotic, mgran