Freespirit...I'm going to speak bluntly 'cause I've been there/done that more than once in my time. This man is NOT going to change, period. He is all about taking care of himself FIRST, and you will always come second (or further down his list of priorities). Just look at the concrete example of the issue with the safe, being robbed and left with nothing, while he protected HIS stuff!
I really suspect any attempt you make to talk to him in a heartfelt manner will just get more frustrating responses, or even hurtful ones....like this is your fault, or you have to deal with it, not my problem, yadda yadda yadda, blah, blah, blah.
The matter of his stinginess alone should be a deal-breaker for you. I also know from years of experience how oppressive it is to live with such a person.
Gather your stuff, get some friend or family member to wire you some money, and get the H out of there. You don't even owe him an explanation. Seriously!