I am so excited. Last night my hubby and I played around. We didn't go all the way but we rounded 3rd base. What I am excited about is that through the whole time I was in a playful mood. I didn't get scared, I didn't dissociate, I didn't become "the prostitute". I was me and I was having fun. AND I was able to tell him no I didn't want to actually have sex. This is a giant leap for me. I have never been able to say no to anything once things got started. On top of that when I did say no I didn't get worried that he would be upset with me. This is such a good thing.
Zen<font color=green>

You live, you learn. You love, you learn. You cry, you learn. You lose, you learn. You bleed, you learn. You scream, you learn.--Alanis Morissette