I don't think anyone here can answer your last question for you. Only YOU can answer that question.

It sounds like you need to do some research. Go out and hang with some transexuals and see how much you have in common with them. Ask questions. Then, hang with some male crossdressers and see how much you have in common with them. Do you want to have women's breasts or are you happy just wearing a bra? Do you dislike your male genitalia? You need to get off the computer and do some real world research.