i need to talk. it is on some thing very hard for me to talk about.

i couldn't bring it up to my therapist today, i see her again in two mondays from now.
i know she would say, i need to talk to my boyfriend.
he tried to talk to me sunday and i failed to talk fully.
he suggested since i was so down today, we talk when he gets home and before i go to work. i don't think that is a good idea.
i tried to hurt myself earlier, i dont want to talk.
i just thought on something though, a concept.
the fears that are connected to revealing weakness in oneself makes it hard to reveal. but to reveal weakness in some ways makes you stronger, right? or is it only sometimes.
will eventually talk, i can write it in my journal.