It feels like my head is twisting to the right and my body is twisting to the left. I have been in bed since 9 last night and I still do not feel like getting up. My p-doc bumped up my Cymbalta from 30 to 60, but that is only making me sick and harder to sleep (she is on vacation, so I don't want to call her again). I need to clean, go to the store, read for class, prepare my lecture for tomorrow, and I don't feel like I am going to get anything done. I don't want to be in this state and I don't want to do the PhD thing anymore. I like my classes this semester; but I don't feel like I have the energy to complete ANYTHING. I am at a loss for words. I haven't been manic in months, only with mixed episodes, because the Trileptal is working on mania. However, NOTHING is working for the depression. I would rather have moments of mania than a few moments of "blah" followed by days upon days of depression. My whole body is aching, so I need to get up... it's going to be physically and emotionally painful today.