I talked to my Therapist today and I told her for the first time in years I am about read to say F*** It to my Pdoc about my meds. I am so frustrated at having to kill the manic every night and every morning.

For some reason beyond my understanding, My meds wear off after 11 or 12 hours. If I don't take them exactly at the precisely right time, I go manic for about an hour before it's time to take them again, or before they kick in again. Does anyone here know how hard it is to kill that feeling twice a day every day? My doctor doesn't. I don't know how much more of this I can take.

Feeling that Manic is more powerful than any drug I have ever taken and I have taken quite a few. I keep taking the meds because I have promised. But I honestly don't know How much longer I can keep that promise if something isn't done or changed.

Can anybody relate to this? Am I just weird? Crazy? off the deep end?
I need to know I am not alone.

My Therapist is going to try and find my Pdoc and see what she can do. This will be a treat. Ha Ha NOT.

I am so sick and tired of being a medical drug dispensary. especially when it is not working. Help I am drowning and I do not have a life preserver???????????????????????