Quote:
Originally Posted by theodora
(((Sandworm)))--Over the years, I have filled many journals with my despair and grief related to my false expectations of those I have loved--whom I thought, believed were the "bees' Knees" in my life. My expectations of others these days is Nil. No one is the "bees knees"...just people...they all have "polka dots" and flaws.
As I prefer to leave past disappointments and sad things in the past; I have a ritual every New Years' Eve.
Once upon a time, I had a little Barbecue in the backyard of my house every New Years Eve which consisted of burning my false expectations of others; therefore my pain associated with it; all of which were in those journals for the year...loved to watch the embers float bright red, hot up into the cold, dark sky in the silent night...marking an end to the old year...the old pain. I no longer own my home, thus, no backyard to perform this little ritual in the privacy of my solitude.
These days I simply shred all my journals every New Years' Eve.
 Journaling is a great way to vent...have done it all my loooong life...I look at them during the course of one year.......then, like all the rest of my writing.......my sorrow.....my fears......and all that I have learned about myself, keeping the knowledge which is useful and I can grow from with me, inside me..................the rest is like my tears......like the rain..........like the demons which haunted me...........
I ignite and extinguish these that I may begin the Year anew~~~~~~Pax, theo
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Finally someone who treats journaling as I do! I destroy most of what I journal, or at least I did until my t asked me to try hard not to do so. I don't like reading my negative thoughts, and this is usually what comes out in journals. I don't even respect what I write enough to read it and then have a big reflection/celebration, as Theodora does. I just write, rip up, and start over another time.
Bluemountains