Hi idgaf, i have just logged back on, for the second time today, mainly due to bordem and feeling restless. No disrespect to this site, as i'm a new member and i'm so glad i found it ! I was reading your post and i can so relate to all that you have said. I to tend to put what i call a barrier up, as that way i don't tend to get hurt, it's like things tend to bounce off, eg
they don't bother me as much. The downside to me doing this is i don't find it easy to display affection and find it hard to connect with people.
At times i do let my guard down, show affection, share a laugh, but eventually it's like a spanner will be thrown in the works and i come crashing down. I also like genuine people who can be themselves sometime's we don't allways like what they say but at least you get to know the people that they truly are. I feel that society is changing so much, to me it's like some people are only mainly concerned about looking after themselves. At times life can be tough for anyone, We are all different, I use to work in Aged Care as a Diversonial Therapist, and it was a job that i really liked because i really like helping and looking after people. We seem to live in a world where people are just so busy, would'nt it be nice if we had some balance in our day to day lives and we could all spend even just a small amount of genuine time for each other. So I'm sorry that you feel the way you do and i can only imagine how it must be for you, as i also feel the same way. Wish i knew what to do, I do wish you the very best.