Maybe she is unwilling to see that what she is doing is wrong because she gets something from unloading on you. Personally I think that it is an improper boundry issue. When a parent uses a child in this way it is switching the parent child role. It is totally unfair to the child. It makes them into the nurturer instead of being the nutured. I think that part of my problem with my mom is that she feels she has to tell me all sorts of stuff about what is going on with my dad and his depression and identity crisis and their marriage and my grandma and what ever because "it is important that I know these things". This is garbage. I don't need to know that my dad thought he might be gay. I don't need to know that my grandma is a ***** toward my sister. These things have nothing to do with the relationship I have with my dad and my grandmother. It only serves to make my mom seem the victim and I should side with her. I don't need this stuff. So when my parents come to visit I spend the time waiting for another serious talk about something I really really do not want to know. I think it is wrong. Unfortunately I have no idea how to make a stop. So I am not much help, just wanted you to know that I think it is bull since I am in the middle of the same pile of....
Zen

<font color=green>You live, you learn. You love, you learn. You cry, you learn. You lose, you learn. You bleed, you learn. You scream, you learn.--Alanis Morissette