I know the feeling and you're not alone! I'm having issues being 39 and single, no husband, no kids. I often wonder what God has in store for me, but I know he has some sort of plan for all of us.

I'm glad you have a reason not to end it all. Also, think of your family and people you know (including your PC peeps!) and how it would effect us if you weren't here!

There are a lot of therapists that will help on a sliding scale fee--I pay my therapist only $30 once or twice a month and she still sees me. You can do a search on the internet (I've used Psychology Today but I'm not sure if that's national) and find a therapist. They are there to help, some of them are there to help even if you don't have money.

Hang in there! There's hope for you--I swear!