its not that other guys hurt them, it's that they surprise them, or make them feel what they want to feel. Confidence is so important, spontaneity is crucial. When it comes to girls there's the 3 second rule. That is you have 3 seconds from the point of deciding you want to talk to a girl, and making contact with her. Any time more then that you will talk yourself out of it or feel too embarassed.

People always used to say "the cool kids never seem to have embarrassing stuff happen to them" and I say they are wrong. "the cool people" have embarrassing stuff happen all the time, they just know how to turn it into a fun time or a positive for them.

for example if you slip and fall, a nerdy person might get wide eyed and go "omg i cant believe that just happened" and scramble to get up and get out of there or be totally mute. A cool person would fall, probably start laughing a lot get up, then make random conversation with someone and make a joke about it. And get to talking with someone they might not know and make a friend . See

its all about capitalizing on opportunities. Book stores are a great place to strike up a conversation with someone smart who reads if thats what you like.

and they say always wear one interesting piece of jewelry or shirt or something that people can comment and start a conversation with you

ive always been the kind of person where you could insult me and be ready to fight me and somehow i would end up getting them to friends.

in addition learn how to dance, learn how to play a sport learn that its the girl who should be lucky to have you not the other way around, but always show her that you are lucky one.


this is all personal experience. and it works.