Kureha,

I am sorry you are having such a hard time. One thing to remember is that the very nature of psychosis/schizophrenia is that you can't tell that you have it. Which of course sounds all very convenient I am sure. I guess you have to find the people who love and care about you and who have always been there for you, and if they are all saying the same thing, maybe they are right and you are mistaken. It is a fact that our senses can and do lie to us. People do see/hear things not there and believe things that are not real. It is such a scary thing to not be able to trust your own mind. My brother is schizophrenic, not taking medications, and a severe alcoholic. He hears voices and is paranoid that people are out to get him. Everyone, from his family to the person on the street walking by, to the newscaster on the TV. Please believe and trust in others. You can get so much healthier and feel so much better if you do. We all care about you here.