Hello Hopeful,

I can relate to a lot of what you have said. I also get the impression you feel some need to express and explore more about your childhood, but are perhaps afraid to confront that history. That could explain your lack of memory. (For me, it's nothing at all between 1st and 2nd grade.) The fact is, what you have described experiencing was abusive, and there is no justification for it.

I really encourage you to explore this more with your T, but keep two things in mind. You can do this safely today with the support of others, and you can take your time. You do not have to deal with it all at once

be well

mtd