granite that really sounds very scary and awful, i'm sorry

but i just want to point out one thing...you are NOT "thinking" these awful things about your T. you have no control of your subconscious while asleep. i can pretty much guarantee that if your told your T this dream that she would empathize with you about how frightening it must have felt to have T betray you in your dream. I think that it probably is clearly showing how scared you are to trust your T...but you are making steps towards it, and i think you are doing wonderful