I'm sorry for all of my posts here, but this is seriously the only place I can truly say what is troubling me, and some people actually understand. So, yeah.
Also, I'm not sure if this goes in this forum, so if not, then sorry.

I feel really bad at the moment. I am in an important year at school and exams/homework a lot (like everyone does) and that's ok, but some of my teachers seem to be ganging up on me..and it's making me feel really anxious. They think I am lying to them, and seem to be picking on me a lot. And I can't take it. I feel stressed and depressed, like nobody wants me and there is no point in anything anymore. I get strange mood swings (I know is common in my age, but from extremes) and I honestly, would not care if I died at the moment. I don't even know why I feel this way. I don't want to sound like a whiny teenager, but I keep hearing this voice telling me to hit people. What if it turns into something bigger?? I know I have said this before, but the birds in my room are really concerning me. Blue attacks me and I'm terrified he will try and peck my eyes out in my sleep. I don't like staying in my room because of that. The Rats are ok, they are mostly just mischievous but I can have conversations with them.

I'm scared though. All of this is scaring me. The OCD, the schizophrenia, the doctors, going to CAMHS, self harm, school, exams, stress, family issues..and no one truly knows how I feel except for you guys. I love everyone here at PC, I actually feel as though I can trust someone. Even you strangers on the internet...that's quite worrying actually. :/ If my parents knew I used this site they would take my stuff from me again and yell at me like when they discovered my self harm. My mum actually said to me, "Don't we deserve better?" and I snapped. I told her she should never have had me. I wish I was brave enough and strong enough. I don't feel sorry for myself either, even if it sounds like that. I dislike myself very much, actually.

But thanks for reading this mini-rant thing, and if anyone has any advice, please comment.