But at the same time telling those methods here isn't very safe for others. I can't do that. and yes I have planned, many times. I'm at a library to stop being at home alone with the tools available. I'm trying to ask people to stay with me when I have to be at home. I don't want to keep asking, but if I don't, I'm afraid that I would use it as an opportunity. I'm scared of my actions, so I stay way from where I could actually do them. I don't want to go back to the hospital, I can do this as an out-patient. I have to. I have to try to handle this by myself. My pdoc does know, I left a message, but that's it. A few people around me know, and that's all I want them to know. Talking about what I have planned, just doesn't work for me. don't worry though there is no date set. No actual intent to do so. But I have to get back to studying Stress... my timer went off, got to get back to it.