No zombie stuff here, nor for most people. If meds do that, then it's the wrong thing for you and you should try something else. I've only had that happen on one antidepressant - not really zombie, but emotionally flat - and from what I've seen people say on PC, it's really not all that common (except for Topamax, that one's apparently stupid-in-a-pill).

I can understand not wanting to feel like a guinea pig, for sure. It's impossible to predict how quick or long the process of finding something that works for you will take. I feel lucky that I hit the jackpot with the right mood stabilizer on the first try, and I'm really not alone in that, but others aren't so fortunate.

With bipolar, the general consensus of professionals seems to be that the longer you go untreated, the worse symptoms tend to get. Research has shown that this is linked to neural degradation, which we all get over time, but which is believed to be faster/different with untreated bipolar. Not everyone accepts this explanation, but there's a lot of scientific evidence that bipolar is primarily organic, meaning it's in your brain, not so much your behavior/thinking. The other way around is more likely the case, behavior/thinking are affected by brain chemistry, so therapy is helpful for that but meds are usually considered the first line treatment.

Some people manage OK without meds (Trippin seems to be doing pretty well with that!) but most of us don't. Some of us don't need anything else once we do have the right meds - my therapist says I don't need therapy as long as my moods stay fairly stable. So really, we all need something a little different, and it's pretty normal to resist meds. I'm just used to it because I get pretty whacked out if I don't take them, which has been true for 20 years, and I can't manage my life very well if I'm basically off my rocker all the time.

Anyway, the more you can keep yourself open to options, trust that your docs are trying to help, and become well informed about the illness and the meds, the more likely you are to figure out the tools that will help you keep your composure without losing what makes you you. Read up - knowing what you're dealing with will be one of your best assets moving forward, and lets you take a greater part in the conversation with your docs.