Although I feel elated and god like when my mania first starts to take flight, it almost always climbs to a point that is less than pleasurable in any way. Usually lasting for months. The anorexia does become much more severe during a manic phase.

It is not uncommon for mania to become a more horrendous feeling rather than pure elation, this I gather from talking to people with similar experiences. One interesting thing to note is that before I was medicated the mania was much more pleasurable. Now it's to the point where it's horrible, psychosis is almost immediate, along with psychomotor agitation, and the racing thoughts are extremely fragmented. Now is this an outcome of medication, or is it the kindling theory in motion? Or it could just be that what starts of as pure mania, takes a turn for dysphoric mania, which I could see, but why the change.