My life is not exactly where I would want it to be. I am very lonely. I am not meeting my potential academically, which is bad, bad, bad for getting into med school. I have a thousand ideas, but I can't implement any of them. Basically, I am trapped.

In the past, I have felt hopeful at times. I believed that I could break free, and I made efforts towards that goal. All of this just to have my progress reversed and my hope shattered by the next big depression that came around.

I'm not depressed, but I still can't help but feel hopeless and powerless. I'm energetic now, but I've learned that that will change. So now I'm fighting a battle against reason just to try to get myself to do anything that will improve my situation.

Has anyone been here before? Any advice on how to create and maintain hope? I don't want to be here forever. I want to feel fully alive. Thanks.