Well, I'm out of here. It's what I wanted, but, I feel so sad. I am even beginning to second guess myself, but, the situation is beyond repair anyway. We are sleeping in separate rooms, not talking, nothing, It is a living hell.. I went out the other night and got home late, around 1am. I was with my friends, well, now I am a slut and a no good *&^(), you know all the names. Anyway, I have put in for a transfer back to my hometown, I will know Monday, but even that, it won't go into effect for at least a month...I can't afford to move anywhere else and then move back there, so I have to stay here...and that is HURTING so much. Not only that, I know that he is hurting too, and that hurts me. There is just to much pain here. I don't have any friends I can stay with so that is out, I haven't made good enough friends living here to ask them, plus I would have to put my things in storage and i need all the money I have to move back home.
Why am I feeling so bad? In a strange way I think I stayed out later than I said I would only to create a scenario where he would want me to leave, ya know that way I wouldn't be the bad guy,,, do you think that is possible?