I also still struggle with anger and frustration ... One of the ways I try to handle it is to try to get the "extreme" thoughts set aside by trying to put whatever's setting me off into perspective.

Failing that, I like to do something physical to get it out of my system ... but in a way that doesn't hurt me or anybody else ... A couple of ways I've found this to be done is to hit tennis balls up against a wall, or to go to a driving range and buy the biggest bucket of balls and hit them instead. I envision the balls as being whoever or whatever I'm angry at, and I simply wallop the hell out of 'em.

Another outlet I've found usefull is those dadgum blow up punching clowns ... Buy two or three of those and set 'em up in various parts of the house. I will leave whatever situation I'm in that's pushing my buttons and go take it out on those guys, then once I've gotten it out of my system, I can rationally discuss whatever it was that sent me into orbit.

I hope that helps.

Sincerely,
BC