This must be a great time of confusion for you. BPD is a controversial diagnosis and usually a lot of people find it takes a long time to get their disorder properly recognised. Im not sure where your from but please go and see your doctor to see whether you require assessment and hopefully from there you will be referred to a team that can offer you the appropriate treatment. DBT can be very hard to access - i myself have been diagnosed for over a year and still can't get on a treatment programme. Don't give up though - u just need to keep pushing and eventually you will get what you need. In the mean time feel free to post whatever questions you have on here or if you just want to vent we're all ears. Good luck