I want to be free from my suicidal thoughts but I will always have them at times throughout my life. I have them now and I hate them. It sucks. I just want to experience life from somebody without a mental illness for a day but maybe not bc that would make it more depressing to live my life. Why do I need to struggle so much and others out there don't. I just wish I did not have to live life having bipolar, ocd, and trichotillomania. Maybe I am feeling sorry for myself and I need to stop but it makes me angry that I am like this and I can't change it. Somewhat I can get better but not completely. I never will.

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