today in session i talked about a really painful memory. When i was 9, the next door neighbors got clues that perhaps abuse was happening. Nothing was ever said until they got into a fight with my mom about another issue, and they used it to degrade our family. They said horrible things about me...and it hurts so much that someone would use sexual abuse claims in a fight, that they sat on it until they needed to use it, and that they would call me a the equivalent of a sl-t. I hated myself then and its hard not to do the same now. i just want it to go away.