((Squiggle)) My therapist and I just talked about this (again) last night. It's something we talk about when it happens because it's important. She just took a class and I was her case study. Last night she was telling me about feedback she got from another person in the class and how his words were on her mind the session before when I did it again. When I found myself pulling away, giving one word answers if I could answer at all.

I am always trying to NOT say something when I am like that. It takes a lot of focus and energy to not say something!

This time it was about something that happened to me years ago, that I was relating to what we were talking about that was happening in the here and now. Other times it is because I am feeling something I don't want to feel, and often that is anger.

So we talked about what it's like for me when this happens, and what it's like for her and how she can help when she sees me going that direction. Just bringing it to the forefront and noticing it and talking about it is very helpful, even if it's her talking and me listening. With the focus and her patience, I'm now able to get out of it then or after the session. It used to take me a lot longer. I think it's important and I love it that we turn it into something to learn from. I'm usually embarrassed when it happens and afterwards, but she is someone I can be embarrassed with, and going through it with her solidifies the trust in the relationship.