Update:
The hospital has passed me on to the same people I've not been able to go to for four months...
My doctor won't prescribe anything yet because in the short term I'll get worse before I get better, and he can't risk me getting worse. He said he can see the anger in my eyes, which actually made me feel sad because I'm not that person.
He's told me that I need to lift up a little bit before he can risk prescribing me anything, to which I replied that I won't lift unless something actually changes in my life...

I think I'm in an endless loop here...