I don't get it-why do I have to second guess myself all the time? It's like I can't give myself credit for anything because I'm too busy criticising every little thing I do wrong. Why can't I give myself a break?
Even when I know I'm in the right, I still doubt myself and nitpick at how impossible I am because I'm so stupid.
Why can't I shut that nagging voice inside my mind off?
It's really annoying me. It darkens my sunny days and rains on all of my parades.
I know all the techniques I'm supposed to do to stop it but sometimes the voice is too strong to silence and it screams over any positive reinforcement exercises I try to do.
I brought a new car, think I'd be happy with that? No! I've been *****ing at myself for giving myself all of these new bills when I could have just invested less money into my old car. (Which was really old and requiring very expensive repairs.)
I got a great clientelle lined up for my business? Do I celebrate and congradulate myself? Of course not, I think of how many more clients I could have if I were really successful.
I stood up for myself with my new landlord and pointed out some things in the lease I didn't think were right. I couldn't trust myself though because I then apologized for being so technical to him and after he left I had to call my Sister and Mom to see if it was okay for me to have pointed those things out and did I have the right to say something about it?
I really get to me when I keep doing this to myself.