Thanks treehouse and farmergirl for your replies.....The "healthy, sane, mature" part of me knows that I should not contact him at all ( or at least at this time in my life ) ......Its the "selfish, immature, unwell " part of me that wants to contact him at this time..... I have a plan in place with my new t that if i get the urge to call my old t I can call my new t, and even my mother in place of calling him...... I just wish that these urges would go away already.....