Hey everyone, I'm a 22yo male and lately have been going through a patch of time where I'm studying my life, where it's gotten me, and where I want to go. Aside from the usual 'career' based thoughts for the future and all that, what I have really been struggling with is the prospect of women. Ive had two girlfriends since I was 17, my first was for 3 years. Aside from those, there have been several flings. With that first relationship, things for me were largely based on the fact of having someone there, someone that cared for me, someone to hold. But on a sexual level, we never connected, and that contributed to the ineveitable break-up (which I still beleive was the right thing to do.) My second girlfriend was just a short two month fling, she came into my life after I had already bought my plane ticket and sold all my possesions to move countries and start a new life. Physically/sexually it was amazing, perfect even. Plus there was the knowledge of having someone there to love, hold, care for. But It was still missing the third part for me, which is a personality connection, something which I have still never felt with any girl that I have known.
Now that I have moved to a new country, made a fresh start, I felt it was time to spend some time looking within, and I'm starting to feel like there's hardly any point in trying to find this right girl for me, because every time I have emotionally involved myself with a girl it ends in me feeling heartbroken. And at my age, and the crowd I kick around with, the easiest way to meet girls is out at clubs, bars, partys, etc. But then I think to myself, the girl I'm looking for isn't one that would just go home with a dude she just met at a bar, not at all. I know I'm young, but I sorta already feel like I've had enough of dates, girlfriends, etc. I really want the right match for me, the right girl, the girl I can call up my parents about and say "This is the girl I'm going to marry".
SO to not turn this into a novel, I wont explain at length my personality traits, life story etc. I have this desperate yearning inside me for a girlfriend again, but once I actually get one the experience isn't as good as I expected, and I begin the cycle over again.I miss being single, on my own, so I go off my own way, then after a couple of months I miss having a girl in my life!
My question at the end of all this is, should I really be feeling this way at the ripe old age of 22? Am I just over-anylizing this like I tend to do with many things in life? How did you feel at 22 in terms of dating/marraige?
Just feels good to talk about this kinda stuff, It's hard to find good ears these days for listenin'.