Bekki,

Just to be blunt.. It seems like that you're running away from your problems. You can't get into dbt, mom won't allow you to use insurance. So you push everyone away to be alone. That's your choice.. The wrong one in my opinion. This is still a good place to receive support. I've private messaged you, provided you with a website for self help with dbt. So plenty of opportunites for support here... If you reconsider we'll be here. If not good luck