((((MindinPieces)))))

Yes, there are times where I DO feel down or awkward and I am not sure why. For me, it usually is when I am interacting with a person and I don't really have a good feeling about the other person. What I used to struggle with is interacting with people I felt were highly educated. I remember having this problem when I was your age to be honest, now that I think about it. First I did struggle because all the time I was growing up my father bearly let me finish a sentence without interupting me or trying to get me to use bigger words. He also talked to me using bigger words himself as well. It got to be very troubling because he would talk and then express a word he knew I didn't know and then he would stop the conversation and talk all the about the word. When he did that he lost me because I would lose, and he would lose the trend of thought in the original conversation. So, my father, although he was trying to increase my vocabulary, he actually put a lot of doubt in me, in my sense of feeling I could successfully interact. I ended up developing a sort of glitch in the flow of thinking words and then uttering them. It took me a long time to talk without tripping over my words.

I think that you have to continue to gain knowledge and keep remembering that other people have self doubt as well. Often other people who invest time and kindness with you do so because they, themselves have struggled and know what it feels like.

It would be nice if you can get to a place beyond this personal struggle, and you CAN do that. What is nice is that once you CAN do this, you will be able to help others do the same. You would truely be surprized at how many people honestly struggle just like you.

Open Eyes