am im still here,

Yes, some of what your experiencing is actually pretty normal for your age. Your not a child anymore and yet your not really grown up either. So, there will be a bit of an internal struggle. Believe me, this is pretty normal. Your not going to truely have a life plan for a while, that takes time to figure out. Some people don't find themselves until their 30's sometimes. The point is to get an education and keep learning. And if your not connecting with your peirs that is normal too, it can be the blind leading the blind in a way because of an age group all trying to figure themselves out.

Now, as far as talking to yourself, relax, this is something ALL people do. I read somewhere that we talk to ourselves 95% of the time. It is thinking outloud and expressing open thoughts and practicing conversing. Open contemplation happens with most people, Normal.

If you don't get along with others and feel out there, a lot of teens feel that way, even the ones that seem to have friends. It doesn't mean your a failure, you honestly have to give yourself a chance to grow. You have some confusion in your home as well, things you didn't expect. This is not who YOU are, you are going to find that out as you continue to learn, grow and live life.

If you keep struggling, maybe talk with a councelor at school, that is what they address all the time, that is why they have a job, teens struggle and need advice.

(((((Hugs))))
Open Eyes