I understand the need to 'know' your T. I am a little sneaky that way. I will ask loaded questions. I will also say things like "I need to know you are human, tell me something that shows me that - a weakness, a challenge for you". If I plan to ask a personal question, I am ready for his "OK, but before I answer that I'm wondering why you would like to know". I will ask what kind of music he likes, his attitudes on things, how he treats his wife. But I will wait for the perfect context to ask. There is always a valid reason for me asking. It is usually an issue of trust or 'are we on the same page?'. I guess that's why he answers. I think I have a pretty good idea who he is now.