I used to journal A LOT! I took notes with me to every session. I typed them out. Gave her a copy and I had mine. We took turns reading. Then we would discuss what was going on with me. There was a lot to talk about.

I have taken posts from PC many times. That would start a good conversation. But lately, I walk in there with nothing. Nothing at all. Sometimes that works. Many times it doesn't. It makes me feel that I wasted a session (money). I have worked on so many issues. I feel like it is redundant to keep talking about the same thing all the time. I don't like doing that!

What do you do when you have nothing to say? I don't want to go into my session tomorrow and sit there like a mute again! She will not really bring anything up. She waits for me. If I stay silent too long, she will try to encourage me in some way. Or she may try to start a conversation. I don't think that therapists really like to do that because they feel that what they may say might not be what we really need. I guess that is why they wait for us to make the first move?

I know that many of you go into a session cold turkey and seem to be fine with that. How can I get to that point and be comfortable with it? I know that I can pull out my "goals" sheet and pick something from that, but if I don't 'feel' it, then I don't want to talk about it. How do you just say, "Today I want to work on not having such a negative self image" or "Today I want to work on how to be a better wife and mother."

That sounds dumb to me. How do you work on that in a session? What would a therapist say? What would I say? It is hard to carry on a conversation about something when you feel absolutely ridiculous even bringing it up because you have already talked about it 1,000,000,000 times!

Sometimes I think I need to just accept some things as they are. I feel like I am beating a dead horse on some topics. Maybe it is because I am stubborn? Or is it because I am trying to change something that is not going to change? I don't know. I just wish I had more of an agenda when I went into a session. Lately I have NOTHING at all to talk about. We do eventually find something to focus on. Maybe she will focus on why I think I have nothing to talk about!

She seems to think that we have a lot to talk about. Isn't that what all therapists say? I know I have issues and I know that I need help. But this is so hard! You guys know how hard it is. I struggle every week to make myself go to my session. It is a tug of war for me. I want to go, I need to go, but I don't want to go.