Great letter, Yang! You write very well. This line, in particular, though, made me feel so angry on your behalf: "There are many days where I’m told that I’m worthless, stupid, a waste of people’s time and energy, and I should just go die because it will give the earth room for much better people to live on it." You have people in your life NOW who say those things to you??? I am so very sorry about that. No one has the right to say anything so horrible to you. You are not worthless or stupid! You write extremely well, and clearly are very bright. You are not a waste of anyone's time and energy. You are supportive and wonderful and the people who are saying these are, in reality, talking about themselves and not you.