I have the same problem. Terrible mom. Taking fault because I was worthless and deserved it. Afraid to ask for help my whole life. Never showing anger. Damn, I even have had a dream over and over being chased through the park by this drug addict who was around me when I was young. Not sure where I'm going with these thoughts and feelings but I am in therapy and believe they will be worked out. Lol I even apologize when I have to burden someone with my issues. You don't ever have to feel sorry to rant to me. You are completely worth my time and deserve all people have to offer you and more!