Quote:
Originally Posted by Chopin99
My T is warm and fuzzy-ish for me now. For the first six months, she was friendly, but distant and clinical. That didn't work with me; then she saw an opportunity to open herself up to me and it worked. I opened up to warm and fuzzy.
I talked to her about the change later. She was cold and clinical because I was distant and aloof. When she told me she had cancer, I softened a bit toward her (one day I had an appointment, she looked like she'd been run over by a truck). I asked what was wrong with her and she decided to take a risk, open up to me about her own problems, and it worked. We saw each other as human rather than clinician and lab rat.
So, your therapist may treat you a certain way based on how you act. If you are not getting the kind of treatment you want, ask for it. If you don't get it, consider someone else!
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Well, sometimes it really doesn't work. I have opened up to this t and asked questions and actually been explicit and SAID, I DON'T FEEL LIKE I DO WELL IN A vaccuum (sorry I've probably mis-spelled that). I need, at least at the beginning of sessions, to be able to have some back and forth, even if it feels like small talk at time.
No response.
Yes, I do need to move on. Which freaks me out...because I have been searching for the right match in a therapist for nearly a year and a half. Four years ago, I had a great therapist but she retired from practice, and sometimes, I long for someone
half that good.
Which I suppose is why I wrote my post to begin with. She WAS NOT PERFECT because she was a human, but she was willing to be human, and that was part of her very-human magic!
And, you know what? I could really really use some support.