okay, I'm having a panic attack this morning and I'm fully aware of it. I'm trying to fight the negative thinking rolling around in my head but it's hard. I'm fifty pounds overweight and my size 12 jeans are really tight this morning. I feel like because I'm fat, I'll never find a man who will love me. Men usually leave me because of my depression/anxiety issues and I feel hopeless about ever finding someone to love me as is. Thanks to my depression meds I have no sex drive and who'd want to have sex with a fat girl? I wouldn't. I want to quit smoking but I'm finding it impossible. I have money troubles and can't clean my house. This is all bombarding me this morning.

Normally I can talk myself out of these things (I love myself and someone else will, too. I CAN quit smoking! The depression meds will kick in soon! This is only temporary!) but oy, if it's not the BIGGEST struggle this morning! Thanks for letting me vent. I'm just waiting for the Xanax to work this morning so I can calm down and start actually doing some work towards resolving these issues...