hummm.. first, I'm glad that she wrote you back. Do you feel like she's being sincere about it? Because I feel it this way but there's no way I could know for sure as I don't know your t...

Yes, I absolutely believe that she is being sincere.

There are some things that you remember incompletely, or inaccurately, but you do have to go on your perceptions and your memories and your feelings.

This made me thought that, hey, if you remember stuff inaccurately, she surely does too. That's being... human being! Everything is perceptions and two different persons will always have two differents perceptions.

That's true... It's just that the big thing about her verifying w/ my psychiatrist about moving to once a week being in my best interest (and here I should add that my psychiatrist is very old school, believed that I should call my T Dr. X) was only done 3.5 months after she decided to make the switch.

How do you feel about everything else that is written in it? I think you could talk to your current t about it, but if the reference thing is bugging you, you could send the email you found telling you that she suggests you staying with her, if you feel you need that to have closure...

I will talk to current T about it - already forwarded to her and will decide whether it's worth it to write back... My parents never believed me about what I said and this hits on that precisely. Other people do (including current T), so this helps...

I don't know all of your story with ext so take what I say next with cautious (or forget about it if you're not there yet or if it's not useful or don't read it at all): if you feel she's being sincere about what she wrote, you could also tell yourself that she truly wanted to help you but she made mistakes and that her perceptions of what happened is incorrect but it wasn't intend to hurt you...

I genuinely believe that she was trying to help, but didn't know how (like my parents). However, I wish that she would have admitted that she was in over her head in terms of training, etc.

take care
faith