I have Always felt years behind other kids when it came to learning basic skills and now as a 21 year old I feel the same.

Everything is a challenge to me. I cant keep my room clean, I cant iron a shirt, I cant make my bed, I Can barely lace new shoes, I Can't tie a tie, My clothes barely fit correctly, Driving is a challenge, Interacting with people is a challenge, I Put off getting haircuts and going to the doctor or dentist, I Feel exhausted just trying to keep up with a daily routine that everyone else does with ease.

Trying to do something I don't fully understand leads to a whirlwind of emotions and frustration that I basically collapse.

I Relied on those around me for so long that I have no independence and feel like I cant make it on my own.

How do I begin to learn common things like this? Why do I have so much trouble with it?
Can anyone give me some advice. I've just been called lazy most of my life but is that true? I feel like I have some disability or mental illness because I cant really function like a normal person.

I'm convinced I have a learning disability and I actually would prefer it if I did because then it would be able to answer what is wrong with me.

It's been mostly just me and my mom and older brother, he is doing just fine and can do everything I listed here without a problem so why is it just me?

Sorry if my post is confusing I feel like it is but I'll try to clear things up if someone doesn't understand it. I Know it seems like it's just "Not being able how to do things" but I feel like it's more than that because I've tried many times and it just doesn't process and when it doesn't it becomes so daunting to learn anything new.

I Taken numerous tests and it said it's Not ADD/ADHD or Autism/Asperger
so what is wrong with me?